Jesse's Kidisms

"Kidisms"  defined are those funny comments, only kids can make, sometimes its kids being innocent and naive, sometimes they are wise beyond their years, simply put, its kid's logic....

My own collection is below, from the bright eyed wonder himself..:)

Things he does that make me laugh

I look forward to going home because as soon as he spots me, he does this funny bouncing motion while chanting "mummy mummy"...heartwarming!
When he hops all over the house shouting 'mummy, look i am bouncing like Tigger'
When he stands on tip toe and he declares, 'look mummy i am big now'...:)
He loves to sing Itsy bitsy spider, and pretend its actually climbing on me or him, i get a kick out of watching his reaction everytime.
The way he dances with excitement when his dad calls me, he recongnises the ringtone i use for my husband, he would run to give me the phone so excitedly 'mum it's dad'!
The way he screams 'it's ready', when the microwave beeps
How he always wants to be 'among' when hubby and i are hugging or lying down together..:)
The way he holds my head in both his hands and says, 'mummy i love you , you are so butiful'.. :)
He calls all things lipstick, lip gloss chap stick umm ( the sound you make while pressing your lips together)
I was removing the price tags from some of his new clothes, when he picked up a price tag and stuck it o)n his forehead. I told him 'don't put that on your head you are priceless'. From that day, whenever he sees a price tag, sellotape or a post it note, he sticks it on himself and declares 'look mum i am priceless'

When he makes up words

For a three year four year old his vocabulary is pretty good, but whenever he needs to talk in past tenses, he makes up the word he thinks should be the appropriate past tense..

I have telled you mummy...
What did you brought?...( i hear this almost everyday)
I falled down...
I drinked it yesterday

We play a game where we rub 'noses' , he would often respond 'mum lets also rub mouthes and eyeses
Dora the Expeller

Specific funny situations

We went to a pharmacy near our home and he was his usual hyper active self and causing so much trouble, i was just tired that day, so i threatened that i would get the doctor to give him an injection ( he is afraid of injections), if he did not calm down. He looks round the pharmacy and at all the pharmacists and says' mum this is not a hospital and he is not even a real doctor, he said pointing at the pharmacist that was attending to me, i said to Jesse , ' he is a real doctor,look at his white coat', he shook his head and said ' i told you mummy, he is not a real doctor'....the pharmacist must have felt sorry for me and my 'situation', so he brought out a syringe and showed my son,,' is this a real injection?' he asked ( good sport he was)..Jesse stopped in his tracks and immediately froze with fear..silence in the pharmacy and then hysterical laughter at how my boy had become a 'believer' now...i still smile when remember..

On the way to the car, after what had just happened at the pharmacy, i mentioned he needed to walk faster, 'daddy will kill us' i said, as we had already wasted too much time ,you know men and now 'believing' son, got to the car and promptly asked my husband, 'dad, where is your gun?' , we both looked blank i suppose, so he continued, 'mum said you were going to kill us, and i just want to see your gun, where is it?' ...yikes!

There is an ongoing fib, in my house, we have told Jesse,that eating pepper makes people grow  big and strong, due to his refusal to eat anything remotely spicy or hot, and as well meaning Nigerian parents we have told him he will not grow tall like his dad if he didn't learn to eat afternoon, we were driving in traffic and some dwarfs were hawking son started yelling and pointed at one of the dwarfs, 'mum look at that man, he didn't eat pepper so he did not grow', ...i cover his mouth with the speed of light..phew!

I was dressing him up just before his dad,would take him to school, when he asked, if when i get the new car,  i would be the one to take him to school ( he knows we are trying to get a new car for me), I said of course, just pray that God blesses your mum and dad. This is the conversation that followed.

Jesse: Jesus, please bless mummy and daddy so they can buy a new car for mummy
Me : Amen
Jesse: Jesus please give mummy a new car
Me : Amen
Jesse: Please give mummy a fine new car
Me : Amen ( by this time i had my mental eyebrow raised)
Jesse : Jesus, give my mummy a fine new pink car
Me: Sweetie, Mummy can't drive a pink car, pray for a colour like black, gold, silver.. <he cuts me off>
Jesse : 'NO!!! are a girl and you should have a pink car ..PINK IS FOR GIRLS OKAY ?!' he says very seriously while holding my head with both hands with his big eyes as round as saucers...i am laughing so hard, that my stomach it by force car ke?

I always say 'Praise the Lord' when i am excited about something, i say it too whenever PHCN restores power and of course he joins me, and loudly too. The first time we took a flight with him, he was so excited and animated because he is fascinated by planes and airports, but when the plane was preparing to take off and all the lights were switched off, he became quiet. But as soon as we were airborne and the lights came back on, my son shouted 'Praise the Lord' ..everyone had a good laugh in our cabin.

His own understanding of things or how to say certain words

He says 'i am firsty' when he wants to drink water
The colour of sunshine is lelow and you can't convince him otherwise
He does not like his cereal watery, he likes it sticky
After we came back from a holiday, and he was asked if he had fun, he responded, yes, Ghana was funny!
When five green bottles are standing on the wall, after one falls down, there will be 'six' bottles, 'don't you know its six mum, can't you count? ...i am too busy laughing to answer...

Yesterday could mean, yesterday, last week, last month, it makes no difference.
Whenever he finishes his homework, he usually announces 'my teacher will so be happy that i did my homework',  i don't even bother correcting the!
Lemon Water is actually Water Melon
He has started saying 'please put off it' 
'Smoke lives inside fire'  is his recent observation
He calls Cucumber  Cumber,i guess the repetition is unnecessary
When asked why he does anything , he always answers using because and that's why eg. why did you finish all the ice cream ? , his response; because, that's why its very nice!
"Mum stop shouting at me it's hurtingful"
"I hurt my finger, please put communion jelly on it" (Petroleum Jelly)

The word 'the' and 'dis' sound alike and in my son's mind they are one and the same. Therefore there is no need to repeat the word in a far we have on the list :

I don't want the boy to sturb me...(disturb)
'Please put  fectant in my water' (disinfectant)
'Where is my ttol'  (dettol )
'I want Christmas coration' ( decoration)
Today he said, 'I can't find my tray it has sappeared' (disappeared)
This is gusting (disgusting)
'Mum Christmas is in cember, right? (december)


  1. Jemmy,

    If only for this page, i am sure following. Jesse is a smart boy: his jesseisms are so witty that i am still laughing. Put the ttol in my water made me laugh till i cried;

  2. Hi thanks for stopping by, we also think he is a very smart boy, we might be biased sha , but he sure makes us laugh a lot! i have checked out your blog, wow the title is in Yoruba, you have already captured my heart with that one o!

  3. Oh lord, you have a smart and funny one on your hands and he seems adorable too. Did you he was 3 here? smh

    I soo can't wait to have mine (bracing myself)

    1. Yeah he is very smart and we are very blessed, yes o he was three here he talks so much, i have not even updated in awhile..yes o, can't wait for you to have your own too, they are so awesome!


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