Tuesday, December 11, 2012

A Strange Friendship


I mentioned in my last post that i met an old friend, i did. Some weeks ago at a petrol station near my house, we were trying to buy fuel during one of the days of fuel scarcity, and because the attendants were only selling into kegs, i had gone home to get two extra kegs while my husband stayed on the queue. The plan was just to drop off the kegs and head back home, but my husband stopped me and introduced my 'friend' to me. I am not sure i should call him an old friend, as we had never seen each other until that moment, this is our story...


I was a reservation call center staff in an airline about eight years ago, and one day i booked a ticket for a really friendly guy on the phone, and when he sent someone to pick up his tickets, he sent me a good tip (win- win). By the time he made the next reservation, we talked some more, he asked me about my self , told me about himself, business etc and we became friends. Sometimes he would call me for bookings, sometimes he would call me just to talk. I discovered after sometime, that he was the son of a really rich and well known man (silly me, i never connected his last name). This was months to my wedding, and we remained friends. My then fiance, now husband met him, and they even did a small business venture together. We got married and he did not come for the wedding, ( he said he forgot), i was not offended, he is a super rich person and calling to remind him of my wedding just seemed like an 'overkill' to me.

We still remained 'phone' friends after i got married, he'd call usually when he needed someone to talk to or just to unwind, and i would send the occasional text message or call and he would always call me back and we would talk about his plans, growing up rich, why he was not in a hurry to get married even though he was  older than we were, what i was up too, my search for the idea job,etc.. Life happens, as it is bound to, and we stopped calling as such and sometimes we just sent the occasional sms to check up on each other (there was no facebook in those days) note; we still had not met, my husband had met him several times, he only sent me a picture and asked that i sent mine to him, which i did.
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After a while he stopped calling and i was surprised (probably naive of me ), but just assumed he was busy and figured  it just wasn't convenient to call because he would call and spend at least 15 minutes on the phone with me on a good day. Looking back now, i think maybe it was just nice to gist with someone outside his usual circle,who was not asking him for money. Around that time also, my phone got stolen along with all my numbers and that was that, i was unable to reach him unless he called, but funny thing, my 'friend' never once called throughout this time. About two years later, i found a list with some of my numbers in an old diary,and i was so excited to see that his number was included in that list.

So i called, then called again, he neither picked up nor returned my calls, i assumed that it was either he had changed his number and i was calling someone else, or he did not have my number anymore and did not recognize who was calling, people like him do not pick calls from numbers they don't know ( do you see where this is heading?) so i send a polite text to the number asking if it was so and so person and i got no reply.. zilch..ouch!.  That just told me it was still his number and i had been snobbed, and i could not figure out why, so i called his office number twice and i was kept holding on, then told to call back...i was sad and confused, i should remind you here again that we had never actually met, we were goods friends only because we spoke on the phone a lot.

I don't take kindly to being snobbed especially by a rich person, it's just rubbing salt on the wound if you know what i mean. I told my husband and deleted his number (my husband thought i was over reacting by the way) and never called him again That was about three years ago. Sometimes i still wonder what the deal was, because we really did talk about real things, and i always enjoyed my conversations with him, he was really smart and he had traveled all over and seen many things. He once told me that i should never consider not having money a problem, he said 'a real problem was one that money could not solve'.But there it was i couldn't make him pick up my calls and i certainly wasn't going to go see him in his office and risk being embarrassed by a snotty secretary, all for someone i had never met? no way! I am factual like that.

So imagine my shock when my husband introduced us at the petrol station. If you knew me, you would know i don't mince words. The first thing i asked him was, what his problem was and why he became a  snob, at first he was shocked, then he denied it,  he said he had lost my number and couldn't remember getting a text from me blah blah, i insisted it was not so, i dared him to deny that his secretary did not tell him i had called his office at least twice, he said he had no recollection of any such incident since it was so long ago, my husband even said i was too hard on the guy, that i should be nice, so out of curiosity, and not because i always listen to my husband. Instead of going home, i stood with him and my husband on the long fuel queue and we talked about him, he said he was bored so he decided to come buy the fuel himself instead of sending someone, and he was pretty excited about it, i told him hustling was not that exciting if you do it everyday like we did. He laughed at my comment and said i had not changed one bit, and we talked about his new business, why he still wasn't married yet, my struggles with having a second child, and getting a new job, he and my husband spoke about business..  and it was just like old times. He apologised sincerely ( well it seemed so to me) and promised he would make it up to me, i told him i would forgive him only if he gets me a good job, and he agreed. I also told him i would not call unless he did so first, he said we had a deal.


I don't have an ending for this( i hate to be a tease, sorry) and i am genuinely confused all over again, because he took my number and promised he would call to redeem himself, and there is still no call almost a month later. I have not decided what to do, whether to call or send a mail at least or just accept that there was nothing happening there and move on. Your thoughts?

P. S, for all the aprokos, in case it was not clear before, he was JUST a friend, absolutely nothing happening there, if you wanna know about my love interests before hubby, maybe another post <wink wink>

27 comments:

  1. I read you well o but are you sure there was nothing though, I mean from his end? #okdenbye

    I'll say send him a message one last time & if he doesn't respond, x him

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    Replies
    1. i don't know Toin, i don't want to send him a msg and get snobbed again..

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  2. LOL I concur with Toin...

    Hmm maybe you should try once more for the sake of the job jare and keep things cool

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    Replies
    1. i thought about the Job issue too but you know people will help if they want to, no matter what you do

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  3. My two cents are that you should not call him again.

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    Replies
    1. abi? i am tending towards that.. but i am so curios as to what his issues are o

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  4. Maybe he began to feel funny, as per you're married, and he wanted to respect your hubby, or he was catching feelings and wanted to give it some distance. I'll say, allow him. If he calls fine, if not, let it go.

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    1. That's a whole new direction, that has never occurred to me,do you think that is it? i mean we never actually met and all

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  5. My only explanation is that he realize he was falling in love with you and you were married.Those kind of feelings need time to go.Don't call or text him,it'd be better for him.

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    1. Hey 9jagreat, thanks for stopping by, you think so too???? its strange cos he very rich and handsome too, he can have any girl he wants o..

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  6. Maybe he likes you and cannot wrap the idea of you been married and knowing your husband around his head.

    Something is going oh and he cannot share with you or maybe as your instincts goes, he is just been a snob.

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    1. Lara you think so too? *scratching head*

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  7. His attitude shows,he started developing feelings for you along the line and since you're married,he finds it's kinda awkward to continue communicating.. I will say you should stop trying to reach him,if he contacts you,fine..

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    1. Becqui, nice to have you here, since everyone thinks this..i will just not bother jare...

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  8. Like, I'm sooo with Myne on this. That's what i felt reading this post. Maybe he is beginning to like you more than he should. But since he is your friend, send him a message. Don't call...just send that message!

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    1. okay, i will send a message happy new year Hazel

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  9. Happy New Year to you and your family dear. I'm with most people on the "he started developing feelings for you and probably feels awkward about it", so just let him be. If he calls you, fine. And if not, fine.

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    1. you think so too,that there might be something going on there..

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  10. Happy New Year again, Jemima.

    I read this very early in the morning and kept turning it over in my mind. I think the guy really liked you, and in fact, still likes you (a lot), and is protecting himself by staying away. It's best to reciprocate and do the same.

    P.S. I can't think of a more 'apt' title. *sigh*

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    1. My earlier comment seems to have disappeared from your blog, i have put it back sha ..he he..i am lost what title are we talking about here..and you are also on the 'he has feelings for me' wagon i see..

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  11. Can you imagine, I never thought he likes you till I started reading people's comments

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    1. Finally a girl after my own heart!!!!! till i read Toin and Myne's comment, the thought never crossed my mind, it never did...

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  12. My dear… Let me break it down. ( Putting my my ITK ( I too know) hat on)…..

    Ol’boy had a crush on you… you never saw it…. he was getting hooked on your convo and basically you losing your phone was his wake up call that he needed to get himself together. Most likely he still one or 2 feeling for you. My advice… leave him alone; for his mind’s sake for now. Let him make the first move to get back in contact but I highly doubt he’ll do it.l

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    1. Okay, i am more than convinced now since practically everyone thinks this.. never saw it coming nor did i imagine it, it changes a lot of things that he did that i have always wondered about.... i did send him a Christmas msg and he called me, we spoke for about 10 mins then he ended the call and promised to call back.. he hasn't called since, he only sent a text about 2 weeks later asking how i was, i replied and wished him a happy new year and left it at that.. i think i have closure now..

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  13. God bless your innocent heart Jemima. I can bet on it that he started liking you and removed himself from the scene course that would have been awkward.

    Now I am even liking him more for being such a good friend. Cause some guys would have tried to take advantage...I don't mean that you would have fallen for him...but he could have made things difficult.
    Let him be.

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    1. aww, i can't remember the last time i was called innocent, i actually think i am really street smart, apparently not so much, i had no idea as in when i saw Myne's comment, i was surprised o, but with everyone agreeing with her... i had to open my eyes...i was really naive sha..and you are right he could have tried to make a move but he didn't, i mean this guy is handsome and very rich...so i guess he is a good 'friend' ..

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